Survive, Transform, Soar! – Issue #7

Can You Outrun the Lion of Depression?
Benefits of Exercise After a Toxic Relationship

Article by: Lauryn Francisco, in SurviveTransformSoar.com | Friday, April 21, 2017

Depression is our body’s natural reaction to loss. When you leave a toxic relationship, you not only lose a person from your life, you lose a dream of what you hoped could be and you usually experience for the first time how much of yourself you have lost.

It’s no wonder you feel depressed!

And it’s not always sadness you experience. For many, there is also a heightened state of anxiety from the adrenaline and cortisol flooding your body. It reminds me of a car accident where after it’s over, you start to shake uncontrollably even though you know you’re OK now.

And what does your body need at that moment to burn off the adrenaline? Movement. Preferably some aerobic exercise like running, just like a caveman (or woman) would need to do when pursued by a hungry lion!

Can running a couple of miles really solve depression, anxiety and emotional stress? Perhaps it is not that simple, but scientific studies prove that there is, in fact, a direct correlation between exercise and the alleviation of depression.

Serotonin is lauded as a great “feel good” chemical in the brain. And, it deserves its stellar reputation! It is a neurotransmitter that does many things in the body, including regulating mood, sleep and appetite (livestrong.com).

However, most people think of serotonin as being primarily produced in the brain, when in fact, about 75% of it is produced in the gut. I can write an entire article on how important it is to take care of your gut through diet and supplementation – and in the future, I will. But today, the talk is all about exercise.

According to the National Institute for Health and Clinical Excellence of the United Kingdom, exercise increases brain serotonin function in humans. Cardiovascular exercise (running, biking, walking, swimming, aerobics classes, etc.) generally induces more of this chemical release, but other types of fitness like yoga and weight training also do to some extent.

By exercising, the brain produces serotonin and other feel-good chemicals (endorphins, endocannabinoids, dopamine), which in turn combat depression.

A study from the Archives of Internal Medicine in 1999 split 156 men & women with depression into three groups. One group started an exercise program, the second group began taking Zoloft (an antidepressant medication) and the last group did both.

After 16 weeks, 60-70% of the individuals no longer were classed as having major depression. It is important to note that the fastest response occurred in the groups taking anti-depressants; however, a follow-up study found that the exercising group had a longer reduction in depression than the medicated group. After six months, the ones still exercising regularly (regardless of which original group they were in) were less likely to relapse into depression.

We know that exercise helps combat depression partly through the release of natural chemicals in the body. What else does exercise help and how does this apply to real life?

Confidence

Individuals who have been in a toxic relationship may have their confidence bent, or even broken. Consistent exercise produces results quickly, especially in the beginning, which can be great for repairing self-image.

When the amount of weight lifted this week is more than last week, when a one mile run is a few seconds quicker than the last run or when the same amount of stairs are climbed but you are less out of breath…that does wonders for the self-image. It is a sense of accomplishment to see yourself improve. But don’t forget to just enjoy the experience too, which will maintain your motivation and contribute to your sense of well-being more than a mindset of pressuring yourself.

Action item: Set small, achievable goals and allow a small reward when each one is hit. Track goals so the progress is easily viewable. Enlisting the help of an encouraging trainer may also be a good idea.

Confidence also grows through how we feel about ourselves, as well as through others’ eyes. For example, compliments will start to come. People will notice a physical difference and will comment on it. It can be a shock to realize that other people see an attractive person before them, when a former partner caused so many feelings of undesirability that you accepted as truth.

Action item: Take monthly PROGRESS PHOTOS. Notice I did not say “before and after photos.” Fitness is a lovely, rewarding journey – and when we are on a journey, we take pictures along the way to remind us where we came from.

Those Pesky Thoughts

Exercise is a worthy distraction from intrusive thoughts and all of your other daily stresses. Framing your exercise as a meditation that focuses you in the present moment or tiring your brain by “pushing through this last round” leaves little room for painful thoughts. Exercise can help to break those thought patterns and make room for something new…and positive.

Action item: Sometimes the negative thoughts surface outside of the gym. Be ready with something to replace them: a memory of a beautiful place, complete with specific details from the five senses, or perhaps a few positive phrases put on repeat. Do not let those negative thoughts take over.

Friendship

There are hundreds of strangers at the local fitness club, perhaps five or 10 of those will become friends. Maybe one or two of them will become GOOD friends. Opening up to new people provides a fresh start and a chance to bond over healthy struggles (i.e., exercises!).

What do most people do when they make eye contact with a stranger in a non-threatening environment? That’s right, they SMILE. Even this simple act can release feel-good chemicals in the brain. So at the least, consider starting with a smile. J

Action item: Give a genuine compliment to a stranger. It will do wonders for both of you.

Habits

Exercise itself can become a habit. When life is filled with positive habits, there is less room for negative ones. In the aftermath of a toxic relationship, many resort to drugs or alcohol to dull the pain. While these can have temporary highs, they result in more harm and the lows keep getting lower.

The high provided by exercise is better: cleaner – healthier –and it lasts longer. It actually does produce those positive chemicals in the brain in a natural way. At times, the choice of healthy habits may be hard, but the view of a sunrise after hiking to the top of the mountain is that much sweeter for the effort.

Action item: Schedule 30 minutes three times per week to commit to exercise and set reminders. Clear the busy schedule. Turn off the phone. Dedicate the time and it will become habit in no time.

Lastly, I will address the fact that some of this is easier said than done. Severe depression makes it hard to get out of bed, let alone put on body-hugging workout clothes, drive to a local gym where it is hard not to feel intimidated, use muscles that maybe have not been used in years, or ever, surrounded by strangers! It is a workout even thinking about it and is hard even for people who are not depressed and anxious.

Action item: start comfortable and start small. Start with a walk around the block. Start with a friend. Or start with a workout in the comfort of home. But start SOMEWHERE. And don’t let go. Your body and your mind will thank you for it.

The bottom line

As a toxic relationship survivor, you are at high risk of adrenal fatigue. One of the best things you can do to help protect yourself is to get some exercise to burn off those excess stress hormones. Just don’t overdo it—extreme exercise has been shown, paradoxically, to stimulate high cortisol levels, exacerbating the condition you are trying to resolve.

Just hang in there and try to get your body moving at least a little bit every day, because you are worth every minute you give to you.